flufftv fluffy_abusers fluffy_pony_dies fluffy_pony_lives holiday_programming

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>Be an executive in charge of holiday programming at Fluffy TV.
>Despite a mix-up that killed hundreds of fluffies viewing a special not meant to air on Halloween, the higher-ups have given you another chance.
>After all, it was that bastard intern who screwed up, not you. Your only crime was getting high and throwing an empty vodka bottle through your neighbors window that night.
>You’ve made up for it. You’ve tried to be good to your last living fluffy. She didn’t want to sleep for a week, and then when you did manage to finally get her calm, you let her out only to remember her you forgot to remove the corpse of her dead friend from in front of the TV. That set her back a little.
>But now it’s near the end of November, and everything has gotten better, including Fluffy TV allowing you to get working on their Fluffsgiving Celebration.
>As before, several regular Fluffy TV shows have been given Thanksgiving makeovers, such as Turkey Baww, and Da Best Nummies on Thanksgiving.
>However, this time you can’t lose. You aren’t actually filming anything special. Instead, you convinced Fluffy TV to sponsor a brand new balloon in the Macy’s Parade, a big pink Pegasus balloon, with a pink foal riding on her back. For the duration of the parade, Fluffy TV will broadcast with their own commentary by John Madden and special guest fluffy, born two months ago on the show Babies!, the red unicorn Apple.
>No way this can go wrong this time.
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>Three days later, and you’re an anonymous abuser. You aren’t generally an anon, but you and several other people are about to pull the greatest feat of fluffy abuse ever witnessed on national television.
>You’ve got one guy on the roof, to…bring it down to your level, so to speak.
>You grip your bat in anticipation, ready to do this.
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>”Hewwo! Dis Apple fo’ Fwuffy TV.”
>”AND I’M JOHN MADDEN! AND WE’RE IN FOR A HECK OF A PARADE TODAY APPLE! I BET WE SEE SOME CARTOON CHARACTERS AND SOME DANCING AND AFTER THIS IS ALL OVER I CAN GO HOME AND WATCH FOOTBALL!”
>-OFF CAMERA- “Uh, Mr. Madden, you don’t have to yell. We can hear you.
>”Apple happy to see biggest fwuffy eva in da pawade today! Aw fwuffies waitin’ to see biggest fwuffy mummeh in wowwd!”
>”MAYBE WE’LL SEE SOME GIANT BALLS TOO! MAYBE FOOTBALLS!”
>-off camera- “I think Madden’s off his meds again.”
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>Be Fluffy TV Executive who has been watching the parade go just a she planned. Plenty of owners have brought their own fluffy ponies out to see the balloon in person. Your sure more, like your sweet, fragile Chilly are watching at home.
>”And hewe she comes! Wadies and Gentwemen, da biggest fwuffy mummeh!” Apple shouts on television as the big pink Pegasus rounds the croner for the cameras.
>Her being a Pegasus was your idea. You figured unicorns and earth ponies might get the idea that they too can fly, and cause a lot of unneeded deaths. Actually, you think that might be kind of funny. Not like the Pegasus ponies can really fly either.
>“THAT’S THE BIGGEST GODDAMN FLUFFY PONY I’VE EVER SEEN! IT’S AS BIG AND ROUND AS A FOOTBALL!”
>You can hear whispers from off screen about calming Madden down, but he brings…well you can’t put your finger on it but something comes to the table with him.
>The fluffy balloon has stopped right in front of the Fluffy TV box. Apple has stopped commenting, just looking up at it in a sort of stupor.
>And that’s when the crowd hears the first pop. The foal atop the fluffy balloon bursts into a hundred small shreds. Several fluffies cry from the crowd, with “Babbeh ‘plode!” or “Nuuu babeh, nu weave mummeh!”
>You sit up. What the fuck just happened.
>Something whooshes close to the Fluffy TV box and slams into the side of the fluffy balloon, riping a wide hole in the side and causing it to begin a slow descent to the ground below. People scramble back as they see it falling.
>On TV, inside the box Apple is panicking, running in circles before shitting heavily on the desk. Suddenly also complaining about sorry poopies, he flails around, trapping himself in the cords attached to his microphone.
>The camera switches back to the balloon which is now much closer to the street. Suddenly, several loud cries ring out, and twenty men wearing all black, carrying megaphones and baseball bats emerge.
>”These are our sorry sticks! Bad fluffies get the sorry stick!” they yell together, before they raise their bats and start beating the fluffy balloon.
>Both cameras are screening now, the left picture the street view shown when the abusers emerged, the right an inside the Fluffy TV box. Apple is bawling his eyes out and getting more tangle din his cords.
>”Nuuu sowwy stick! Apple gud fwuffy! Apple gud fwuffy!” he cries before trying to dive off the desk.
>”Oh shit, grab him!” someone yells.
>Madden just sits there, but someone, presumably the camera man, dives for Apple. He misses, but knocks the camera itself over the desk. The camera lays pointed downward, revealing Apple limply hanging from the wires, which apparently snapped his neck in the fall.
?You watch in horror as the camera stays on the shot on the right. Several background cries about cutting the feed can be ehard.
>On the other camera, the abusers have taken to the crowd, avoiding oncoming police, and chasing down several fluffies who panicked and wriggled away from their owners. A couple cries in the street nearby over the ebaten bodies of their two fluffies, evidently caught and killed by the abusers.
>On the other screen the camera is at least righted after a few minutes away from Apple’s body. Suddenly Madden perks up. “AND HERE COMES THE GARFIELD FLOAT! OH IT’S TAKING OUT WHATEVER IS LEFT OF THAT STUPID PONY FLOAT! GUESS THAT’S GOOD NIGHT EVERBODY! EAT SOME FOOD AND WATCH SOME FOOTBALL!!!!!”
>Without another word Madden gets up and leaves very randomly.
>Suddenly the entire feed goes dark, replaced once again by the technical difficulties screen.
>You’ve forgotten this whole time Chilly was watching with you. She’s no longer on your lap.
>Find her once again balled up under the couch.
>Before you comfort her, it hits you that this will probably affect your job. Surely though, you couldn’t have foreseen this.
>Realize you’re probably fucked either way. And this time you don’t even have any blow.

Uploader S_D_J22,
Tags flufftv fluffy_abusers fluffy_pony_dies fluffy_pony_lives holiday_programming
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Comments


- Reply
lordanubis: Hahahaha, oh man. Nobody can have nice things in the Fluffyverse
- Reply
PandaSennin: I feel sorry for the dude. But abusers do ruin it for some.

- Reply
Tartan_Fluffy: Typical fucking NYPD incompetence right there.

Hm, is it me, or could another, smaller, collab be built around Fluff TV? Just the chaos of making a full schedule for just one day of the channel airing? A show or two a writer, the live shows being the most chaotic by default. Someone doing something with some poor sod trying to run the whole station...

Maybe even some imported shows or foreign versions of existing shows being produced.
- Reply
KRDiStort: Okay, I get that they wanted to crush a few corporate owned fluffies for shiggles, whatever.
But was running into the crowed and pummeling fluffies that were visibly owned by people really necessary?
I mean, even if you completely discount them as animals, that's still heavy property damage. And that's a tad dickish.
- Reply
MisterRobot: And that's why you don't make parades for fluffy ponies. Waste of money, and an insult to all other problems of the world anyway.

- Reply
RiddleOfFluff: @MisterRobot: It's the Macy's Parade, a parade in which people line up to see newspaper comic characters lazily float down the street. How does adding a fluffy balloon suddenly make it a waste of money or an insult to the world?
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PandaSennin: @MisterRobot: There are other problems in the world?

- Reply
Mayclore: @Tartan_Fluffy: Oh, that could be fun.

"I finally had to fire Lucy."
"Where is she working now?"
"Some TV network out east, or something."

- Reply
Mayclore: ...I meant Tiffany there. Damn it.

- Reply
RiddleOfFluff: @Tartan_Fluffy: Sounds interesting, Fluff TV's got potential for both some serious hugbox and tragedy.

@Mayclore: @Mayclore: I hope the people who hire staff for Babies do psych evaluations. That bitch be crazy.

- Reply
deathproofpony: That was amazing... I never would have thought of that. The greatest example of fluffy abuse ever... beating a giant fluffy balloon to death. Amazing.

Reminds me of that episode of Night Court where Harry gets fired and plans the greatest prank ever - to put a giant funny nose glasses on the Statue of Liberty but then he gets his job back.

Great work.

- Reply
Tabula_Rojo: this needed more "BOOM! TOUGH ACTIN' TINACTIN"

otherwise excellent
- Reply
PhantomFluffy: Asshole abusers ruining Thanksgiving.

- Reply
Ferrotter: "That set her back a little." LOL!
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Anonymous1: I lost it at the bit about the Garfield float. Nice work.
- Reply
Anonymous2: More Fluff TV please.

- Reply
natedash1: That was hilarious!
Thread locked for the current user.