Room for Improvements
Test Subjects: Fluffies and Herd(s)
Scientist on Project: Richard “Rickie” Burns
1: Finding Fluffies
Notes: This should be relatively easy if I do not kill them in the process. I will be collecting them from different environments such as rural areas and urban settings.
2: Understanding Anatomy
Notes: This will be very straight forward mostly, you cut the creature open. With a band saw, scalpels, bone saws, and etc. But, before we get to the more visceral parts I need to conduct a series of tests to see how it survives physically such as elements, hazards, and other climates.
2.5: Understanding Psychology
Notes: This stage will mostly about finding out how the fluffy ticks. I will be employing a series of tests on the creatures to see if the can handle or solve the problem. I will see how they handle stressors.
3: Training Fluffies
4: Study on Pregnant Fluffy
5: Creating Subspecies
6: Improving Fluffies
There were some disturbing reports coming from Portland, fluffies were dying by the dozens. I will be driving down to see what these sightings are all about. I really don’t know what to expect, it could be a pack of dogs or a crafty abuser. One thing is for certain is that I’m going to enjoy finding out what is there. To keep my stock of fluffies safe I either need to automate the system or hire someone to do this. Until then I will continue with stage two point five. Which is my psychological part of the test.
I going to be testing their mental understanding of what comes prepared in their minds and what “survival instincts” they have.
Fluffy: Sketti! Ya! Fluffy wuv sketti!
Rick: Do you even know what it is?
Fluffy: Huh, what?
Rick: Do you. Even know. What “Sketti” is?
Rick: Ok, ok, I’ve got a challenge for you.
Fluffy: A chawwenge?
I place two plates of pasta in front of the fluffy, one is traditional spaghetti and the other is ravioli and meat balls.
Rick: Ok, which one is “sketti” and which one is not?
Fluffy: Dat one.
Rick: Let it be known that the fluffy pointed to the spaghetti.
Fluffy: Can has nummies?
Rick: No, now comes a second set.
Next dishes I place out are Pasta Salad and the other dish being Carbonara.
Rick: Ok, now which one?
Fluffy: Uh... Uuuuuuuh...
Rick: FUUUUUUCK!!! Choose a dish!
Fluffy: *scream* UUUUUUH! Uuuuuuuh!
Rick: *At that point I pin the fluffy to the table with my hand* Which fucking one?! NOOOOW!
Fluffy: AAAaaaaah! HUUU HUUU HUUU!
Rick: Answer! Just answer the question! Which one is it? Answer or Die!
Rick: *At that point I pull out my CCW Pistol and aim at its head* You got till the count of FIVE!
Fluffy: Fluffy nu not how to count five!
Fluffy: UuuuH Don’t nu!
Fluffy: Aaaah! DA weft ONE!
Rick: *Unpins the fluffy’s head and holters the gun.*
Rick: Let it be known the Fluffy choose the Carbonara.
Fluffy: Was d-d-dat it?
Rick: Yep, that was it. That was all I needed.
Fluffy: Why you-
In this test, I will be testing the fluffy’s “determination” to see how much willpower to get over obstacles and how far can I push the creature.
I dug a 75ft trench and filled it with scrap and pieces of wood and debris. I then filled it partially with cloth and old clothes in somewhat pile through the trench (and a surprise under it). This will serve as an impromptu timer for the fluffy.
Rick: Ok, here’s the next challenge. Crawl through this trench of shit and you get your treat.
Rick: Yes, Really.
Fluffy: But you said dat about the wast time?
Rick: Listen here you little shit. I don’t really care. Got it? Now get in there.
Fluffy: O-otay, Mista wick. How?
Rick: Hnn, like this.
Rick: You have a one minute head start. Run fast.
Fluffy: But fluffy-
Rick: RUN THE FUCK FAST!
Fluffy: Aaah! (Fluffy starts running away)
Rick: (metallic flicking can be heard) Maybe a minute or two longer if I don’t get this thing started...
The fluffy moved quickly through the piles of clothes although getting stuck on a line of barbed wire. (With some coaxing he got off the barbed wire without a lock of his hair.) It then continued over a couple of mounds of clothes. At this point the fire was losing ground at the 50ft mark, which was time for me to break one of his legs. I went for the front left. This I hope added to the list stressors mounting to this situation.
Rick: Ok, I put out the fire. Now give me your leg.
Fluffy: My weggie? Nu huwt fwuffy.
Rick: No, now shut up and give me your leg.
Fluffy: Nu huwt fwuffy. Nu huwt Fwuffy!
Rick: Hey, fluffy. Sketties!
Fluffy: YA! Sketties! (Bone snapping) Aaaaaaaah!
Rick: After this I’ll fix you up. You got a minute.
Fluffy: (Whimpering can be heard)
Rick: Now go.
Rick: Now to start the fire again. (Metallic flicking can be heard.)
After doing this the fluffy was limping for the rest of the experiment. The fire was able to stay on him without losing ground. The fluffy had to maneuver over and around boxes which was an interesting sight to see. It took a tumble off one of the stacked crates before getting back to toddling down the trench. At the end of the 75 ft marker, the little creature had scrapes and scratches all over it from having to go through the sharp metal pieces and plastic shards. I pulled him out with the fire nipping at his hoofs. When the fire died down and burnt out...
Fluffy: (Heavy breathing)
Rick: Well! That was fun wasn’t it?
Fluffy: (Labored Breathing)
Rick: Eh, let’s get you fixed up.
Fluffy: Thanks, Mista Wick.
Rick: But before we do, can you look back at that trench. Do you see anything?
Fluffy: Does wocks?
Rick: Yes, those rocks are the fluffies who didn’t make through the course.
Fluffy: (Heavier and faster breathing) Uh...
Rick: Oh, he fainted on me. And shit himself. At least he’s not dead. Time to fix his leg and get him is reward.
I splinted the leg, he will be a staying in a one of the wall cages while he recovers. There will be more tests to do. Overall the test was quite interesting the creature at this point showed some perseverance and didn’t complain. Maybe it was the test from before? I guess they mature a little quicker when you grant them asylum by beating their then leader to a pulp with a modified mini bat.
-5 feral fluffies
+1 tranfered fluffy now named: Scratch, Cyan/Lavender/Earth
All this testing has made me quite tired, I have ordered some parts for a creation I have been working on in my spare time. I’ll give you a parts list to see if you can guess to what I going to be working on.
1x .458 SOCOM Upper
100 pounds of steel
100 ft of sheet metal
60x .458 SOCOM Rounds
3x Miniature Cameras
1x Miniature 22lr Browning M1919 Full Auto
2x Small Gas powered engines (with reverse)
1x Radio Control Receiver
2x FPV Transmitters
3x Long Range Antennas
1x Microphone Headset
1x FPV Headset
500x 22lr Rounds
200x 22lr Tracer Rounds
5x Servo Motors (Various Powers)
1x RC Transmitter
2x AR-15 Magazines
1x Holographic Sight
3x Lipo Batteries
2x Small lights
And a few other miscellaneous parts and pieces that could not be named.
For the next couple of stories I might be taking a break from using the SCP format for stories. So when that comes around let me know how it goes.